Most Likely Three Strikes and You're Out
© 1994 Watunes (BMI)
(From "Sing it Loud" and "The Best of the Foremen")
(A slightly re-written — and completely re-arranged — version appears on "What's Left")
John Q. Congress became a man
In the mean streets of Happyburb
Spent his allowance at Dairy Queen
Jumped his Stingray off the curb
Rose to fame in the Little League
It was there without a doubt
That he came to love the concept of
Three Strikes and You're Out
They sent John Q to Washington
Just to toss around the old horsehide
And he threw 'em a curve or two
Pretty soon he was high and inside
And then he drafted a crime bill
It was Johnny's finest clout
And he gave it a name after the game
He called it Three Strikes and You're Out
You hit a serious foul or two
And you're right back at the plate
But swing and miss on the third time
And your bills are paid by the state
"Don't you worry 'bout healthcare,"
Johnny stated feelin' stout,
"'Cause everyone is covered under
Three Strikes and You're Out."
John Q knew it was workin'
When they closed all the public schools
All the neighborhood playgrounds
All the libraries, parks and pools
And all the kids went to prison camp
Poundin' gravel and scrubbin' grout
Had the warden bind their hands behind 'em
For Three Strikes and You're Out
John Q. Congress, he wrote a check
And that check took a bad bounce
Spent some time on the farm team
Where they caught him with an ounce
"So I got me two strikes," he said
To reporters standin' about
"But you quote me that I'll still go to bat
For Three Strikes and You're Out."
John Q Congress, he robbed a bank
With a pistol he had stole-n
Hijacked a tour bus across state lines
Didn't even pay the turnpike toll
And the judge said, "Strike Three, John,
I oughta sentence you life in the dugout
But I'm not inclined to put you in a bind
'Cause you're not the kind the bill was designed
To keep confined and out of mind
'Cause Justice is blind with one hand tied behind her
For Three Strikes and You're Out."