What If
© 1998 Watunes (BMI)
(From Comic Sutra - Live at Luna Park)
What if all of life is like one day in the life of God
From the dawn of time, right up to now
One day in the life of God
And what if God is having a shitty day
What if someone said to God, "Hey, God, what did you do today?"
And God said, "Oh, you know, humanity."
And they said, "Well, there's always tomorrow."
What if God, in God's own world, is an underachiever
Or a beautiful and highly intelligent, faithful, kind and loving golden retriever
What if God is pissed that hell gets all the best musicians?
What if God created the world in His own image like we all do every day?
I see God every day in everyone except for Tony Robbins
He's that guy on cable TV with too many teeth who says, "I'm not a motivational speaker."
And what if God is some insufferable yuppie know-it-all
Who's just powerful enough to make a lawn so big that even He can't mow it all
What if God is dead and the riches of His kingdom are tied up in probate?
Forever and ever . . .
What if God created the world, set motion to the world, breathed life into the world
And walked around the world with toilet paper stuck to His sandal
And no one had the courtesy to tell Him, in fact they laughed at Him openly
And what if God got to feeling small and kind of helpless
And decided to give up on the world, say "To hell with the world!"
And go to work instead on developing His pectorals
Or some other aspect of His own image
Like we all do every day