HELP ME, MY LIPS ARE TOO BIG

words and music
copyright © 2003 by
Roy Zimmerman

Help me, oh help me, my lips are too big
My face is too tights, and my lips are too big
I got a horrible crick in my neck
Just trying to carry my lips to this gig

Help me, oh help me, my ass if too firm
My ass is too firm, and my abs are too hard
I took a golf ball today in the abs
It bounced off and killed a security guard

Help me somebody, my tits are too huge
My tits have a different zip code from mine
I got a postcard today from my tits
They saw me at Starbucks behind them in line

And they miss me

My cheeks are hollower than the Academy Awards
My teeth are whiter and straighter than the 700 Club
My eyes are bigger than Julius Caesar
My hair has more body than Jeffry Dahmer’s freezer

Oh, help me
Help me

Help me, oh help me, my lips are too big
My lips are ballooning all over the place
They put too much of my ass in my lips
Now I feel like I’m sitting on my own face

HOMELAND is available as a CD, as a digital download, as a part of the Homeland/Security bundle (ON SALE) and as a part of the Complete Collection.

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