NOTHING BUT THE BEST
words and music
copyright © 2005 by
Roy Zimmerman and Melanie Harby
copyright © 2005 by
Roy Zimmerman and Melanie Harby
We chose her chromosomes from a mail-order vendor
Intelligence and disposition, color race and gender
We started interviewing for a surrogate womb
He had the Hilton build us a delivery room
And when the moment came, we shouted, “Camera Three, zoom!”
Yeah
She’d been with William Morris since the second trimester
We sent a contribution and the Vatican blessed her
She wore Versace diapers and a Givenchy bib
We kept a tape of L. Ron Hubbard playing in her crib
We had a plastic surgeon take out her second rib
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Guatemalan nanny and an all-terrain stroller
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Home where she belongs…
To us
We hired Tony Little as her personal trainer
We found an orthodontist and we kept him on retainer
We made her take the MENSA test until she got in
And when she got the flu we took her to Benny Hinn
She learned sex education reading Anais Nin
We released her high school record as a single, and it charted
We made her finish finishing school before she even started
We sanitized her bedroom and we vacuumed her thighs
We sent her off to college with collagen in her eyes
Said, “Don’t come back until you’ve won the Pulitzer Prize”
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Live-in psychic and designer tranquilizers
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Home where she belongs…
To us
We hired a private eye to let us know what she does
We bought a Third World country for her just because
We think she’s something else … She says she wishes she was
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Primal scream coaching and the Betty Ford Clinic
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Home where she belongs…
We’re never home where she belongs…
To us
Intelligence and disposition, color race and gender
We started interviewing for a surrogate womb
He had the Hilton build us a delivery room
And when the moment came, we shouted, “Camera Three, zoom!”
Yeah
She’d been with William Morris since the second trimester
We sent a contribution and the Vatican blessed her
She wore Versace diapers and a Givenchy bib
We kept a tape of L. Ron Hubbard playing in her crib
We had a plastic surgeon take out her second rib
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Guatemalan nanny and an all-terrain stroller
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Home where she belongs…
To us
We hired Tony Little as her personal trainer
We found an orthodontist and we kept him on retainer
We made her take the MENSA test until she got in
And when she got the flu we took her to Benny Hinn
She learned sex education reading Anais Nin
We released her high school record as a single, and it charted
We made her finish finishing school before she even started
We sanitized her bedroom and we vacuumed her thighs
We sent her off to college with collagen in her eyes
Said, “Don’t come back until you’ve won the Pulitzer Prize”
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Live-in psychic and designer tranquilizers
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Home where she belongs…
To us
We hired a private eye to let us know what she does
We bought a Third World country for her just because
We think she’s something else … She says she wishes she was
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Primal scream coaching and the Betty Ford Clinic
Nothing but the best for our little girl
Home where she belongs…
We’re never home where she belongs…
To us
